At times husbands may feel a little pressure to plan the perfect evening for our spouses on their anniversary. This year, I don’t think I will stress about making dinner reservations and dealing with crowds, noises, and finding the right parking place. I have an excuse: coronavirus (COVID-19).

Debbie and I work hard to find a balance between supporting our ministry, hosting a business, providing for, and protecting the well-being of our family and community. Tonight, we are taking the night off 😊.

I am creating a smoked brisket recipe. This recipe is based on my favorite chef’s Creole Seasoning, which will be injected and used as a rub. Also, I am taking notes of what works and writing on the process of prep, smoke, and serve.  This will be interesting… My prep and recipe, so far:

​INGREDIENTS

• 1 (2-4 pound) beef brisket, trimmed
• 2 tablespoons dark brown sugar
• 1 heaping teaspoon Emeril’s Creole Seasoning Essence
• ½ cup of water
• ½ cup of favorite barbecue (BBQ) sauce
• Mesquite wood chips

DIRECTIONS

1. Pre-soak mesquite wood chips in a large bowl of water for 1 to 2 hours. Remove, drain and set aside. Saving drained liquid for smoker water tray.
2. Set the brisket on a large sheet of aluminum wrap. In a 2-quart pot, combine the dark brown sugar, water, BBQ sauce and Emeril’s Creole Seasoning Essence (listed Below) and bring to a brief boil. Using cheesecloth[1], strain contents of pot into a bowl, keeping strained mixture as a rub. Using an Marinade Injector Syringe, inject liquid into brisket every 1 inch. Rub the strained mixture onto the brisket and wrap tightly in the plastic wrap.
3. Prepare a smoker with charcoal and the wood chips according to the manufacturer's instructions to 180 to 200 degrees F. Place the water pan in the smoker and add water to the fill line, about 2/3 full. Place the unwrapped brisket on the lower rack off the direct heat, close the lid, and cook, regularly stoking the fire and adding additional chips, until an instant-read thermometer registers an internal temperature of 140 to 145 degrees F., about 4 to 5 hours.
4. Remove the meat from the grill and let rest for 20 minutes before carving the meat against the grain.
5. Serve with Barbecue Sauce on the side for dipping.

Alternative overnight method:

• Place brisket on a baking sheet and let marinate refrigerated at least 6 hours or overnight.
• Remove the meat from the refrigerator and let come to room temperature.
• Wrap in a large sheet of heavy aluminum foil and continue with the third step listed above.

Alternately stove-top smoker[2] (according to the manufacturer's instructions).

• Place the unwrapped brisket on the rack over low heat. Close the lid and smoke for 1 hour. Preheat the oven to 275 degrees F.
• Remove the meat from the smoker and wrap in a large sheet of heavy aluminum foil. Place on a baking sheet and roast until tender and an instant-read thermometer registers an internal temperature of 140 to 145 degrees F., about 2 to 3 hours.
• Remove the meat from the oven and let rest for 20 minutes before carving the meat against the grain.

 ……………………………………………………………………………………………………
Emeril’s Creole Seasoning Essence:
INGREDIENTS

• 2 1/2 tablespoons paprika
• 2 tablespoons salt
• 2 tablespoons garlic powder
• 1 tablespoon black pepper
• 1 tablespoon onion powder
• 1 tablespoon cayenne pepper
• 1 tablespoon dried leaf oregano
• 1 tablespoon dried thyme

 
DIRECTIONS

• Combine all ingredients thoroughly and store in an airtight jar or container.

 
[1] Or use a substitute: https://www.leaf.tv/articles/substitutes-for-cheesecloth/.

[2] Stovetop Smokers – 2020 Reviews: https://www.willysmoke.com/stovetop-smokers/

In recent years, more and more people have embraced a return of spiritual practices.[1] Why? To create space, slow down and become quiet - these actions need no other justification.[2] We are so inundated with good works or by life in general, focusing becomes hard, and our priorities become diluted.

By definition, sacred is something connected with God or dedicated to a religious purpose; it is considered holy. A pause creates breathing space by interrupting our busyness; when sacred and pause connects intention and attention, space opens up within for God to work.

In his book, Leadership, Northouse describes a method for adaptive leaders to step out of the brouhaha of a busy day and find perspective amid the challenges called, “Getting on the balcony.” This metaphor gives an allusion to a dance floor; we need to be above the dancing to understand what is going on below; being on the balcony enables us to see the big picture.[3]

A Sacred Pause is a practice that refocuses our “Big Picture,” we are pausing (a deep breath), giving thanks, and praying, which redirects these moments of focus into personal renewal, centering in Christ.

This spiritual practice of A Sacred Pause takes me to uncomfortable places, but they are places to which I must go. It is a pain and such a blessing. Every day at 2:20 pm, my alarm (on my watch and phone) will go off at such inopportune times. How dare it interrupt during a meeting, lunch, driving, talking, engaging in a conversation, or even (Heaven forbid) during a nap. Yet, there is no substitute to a vital behavior we all need in our lives - to “pause,” give thanks and pray to the one that gives it all.

[1] Such as: hospitality, living gratefully, service/justice, savoring beauty, nature, pilgrimages, forgiveness, suffering, art, mindfulness, journaling, simplicity, wonder, quiet.
[2] Yamasaki, April. Sacred Pauses. Harrisonburg, VA: Herald Press, 2013. (Loc. 565 of 2633)
[3] Northouse, Peter G. Leadership: Theory and Practice, 7th Edition. Los Angeles: Sage, 2016. (263)

I have spent my life fixing things.  My whole reality is built around what to do in different situations.  This is broke (do this), this is making this sound (do that), or this is causing that… “Yep, I know this, let’s fix it.” 

After the Gulf War, I was finished with aircraft support, I had to move on.  I just went the 12 rounds, achieved what I trained for, there was not anything left for me.  So, I went to recruiting and asked, “What’s open?”  All the same old things were listed until I saw the W’s – Weather, Weather Forecaster.  Seriously?

My classmates and I spent 5 days a week, 9 hours a day in classes for 10 months. Training in physics, mathematical formulas and models upon models.  Then, I spent another 3 months in follow-on training. Everything was about memorization and absorbing: in this situation, this happens because this force acts this away; when this happens, that changes this element, and now the factors are different. (Gonzales, 116) On and on, mental models after mental models.  We had to know 1,000’s of models and become experts in situational awareness for any environment anywhere around the world. I was programmed to view everything in models, and I carried this on into my life after the military.  I am prone to look for situations that I was familiar with and gravitate to those environments. 

In Deep Survival: Who Lives, Who Dies, and Why, Laurence Gonzales recommends that we need to become aware of our situation, he says on page 78, “… the most successful is open to the changing nature of their environment. They are curious to know what’s up.” Then he sticks the knife into it on the next page, “Some people update their models better than others. They are called survivors.”

While thinking about how experiences shape our reality, I wondered: isn't wisdom, experience plus knowledge?
Then this last Monday, my view of everything was changed again...

I started out the morning in contemplative prayer and then moved into my daily Spiritual Exercise. My exercises are based on a book by Kevin O’Brien called The Ignatian Adventure.  It is not a book for spiritual enlightenment; instead, this is spiritual balance with focus, lessens to listen and a selective activity for the day.  I was on Week #2, day 7 and this “Day” has stuck with me the whole week, like the movie Groundhog Day, it keeps repeating. I could not move on.  I mean come on, how hard is it to “Practice being astonished” (O’Brien 2011, 47). Astonished means “greatly surprised or impressed; amazed.”  Yeah, this should not be that hard... Unless, you are also reading, Deep Survival: Who Lives, Who Dies, and Why at the same time.   

Gonzales wrote with his young daughter their “Rules of Life.”  The first rule started with: Be here now (Gonzales, 121). Then Gonzales explains the difference which determines, “Who Lives, Who Dies, and Why” and his suggestions: “first staying out of trouble, then for dealing with it when it comes.” (Gonzales, 263)

After reading this book and looking at information compiled in the Appendix, I am considering including these into my Rules of Life:

• perceive, believe, then act
• avoid impulsive behavior; don’t hurry.
• stay calm: use humor and keep calm, use fear to focus
• celebrate your successes, take joy in completing tasks
• count your blessings and see the beauty

This is a simple list, with practical things that are impactful and insightful. I know we live our lives in environments that are safe yet can turn deadly at any time. So, as I practice being astonished and perceive my environment differently through the day; whether it be at work, in Bible study or at rest, I hold true to knowing I am not alone in these situations. 

Works Referenced:
Gonzales, Laurence. Deep Survival: Who Lives, Who Dies, and Why: True Stories of Miraculous Endurance and Sudden Death. New York: W.W. Norton, 2017.
Lawrence, Brother. The Practice of the Presence of God: The Best Rule of Holy Life. LONDON: THE EPWORTH PRESS, 1691.
O’Brien, Kevin F. The Ignatian Adventure: Experiencing the Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius in Daily Life. Chicago: Loyola Press, 2011.
Murray, Bill, Groundhog Day, Directed by Harold Ramis, Columbia Pictures: February 12, 1993.
[1] Mr. Barnes is our 87-yr. old praying Elder; that’s all he wants to do is pray – he is our Brother Lawrence
 

​A separation from God leaves a restless desire for something more, C.S. Lewis adds in Mere Christianity: “Creatures are not born with desires unless satisfaction for those desires exists … If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.”[1] The 17th Century philosopher and mathematician Blaise Pascal writes:

“All men seek happiness … What is it then that this desire and this inability proclaim to us, but that there was once in man a true happiness of which there now remain to him only the mark and empty trace, which he in vain tries to fill from all his surroundings, seeking from things absent the help he does not obtain in things present? But these are all inadequate, because the infinite abyss can only be filled by an infinite and immutable object, that is to say, only by God Himself.” [2]

​In this basic poem, I try to explain how God fills the void called emptiness:

The Light casts away the darkness,
while the Wind brings forgiveness, 
and the Word speaks a new creation,
bringing Life into the emptiness. 

The Light casts away the darkness,

• John 8:12, “Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.

while the Wind brings forgiveness,

• Acts 2:2, “And suddenly there came from heaven a noise like a violent rushing wind, and it filled the whole house where they were sitting.”

and the Word speaks a new creation;

• John 1:1-3, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things were made through him, and without him was not anything made that was made.”
• 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.”

bringing Life into the emptiness.

• John 1:4-5, “In him was life, and the life was the light of men. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
• We all have an empty place in our souls that only the Holy Spirit can fill. The lament of Psalm 42:2, “My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?”

[1] C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity
[2} Pascal, Blaise Pascal's Pensées. New York: E.P. Dutton & Co., 1958, Accessed: https://www.gutenberg.org/files/18269/18269-h/18269-h.htm (425)

PRAYER:
Father, we, your church, ask that you pour your blessing upon us... Open this text to our hearts. Come, Holy Spirit, and teach us the Word: give us ears to listen, hearts to hear. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
OPENER:
Acts chapter 8 is a transitional point of the book of Acts: the movement of the church, this is Phase Two of God’s plan for the church, moving out from Jerusalem into Judea and Samaria.
What was the trigger that set off the persecution of all Christians? It was because of Stephen that this whole avalanche of persecution came down. The persecution that is surprisingly one of the most significant human rights issues in the world today.
We can view this persecution as a negative time, or we can see the Holy Spirit at work, taking a negative, hopeless situation and turning it into a positive.
These are four things to remember when life is hard:[1]

1. Your Character should always be more durable than your Circumstances. We cannot always control what happens to us, but we can always control how we choose to respond. In those moments stop complaining and give thanks to God for the good in life, the parts that seem bad start to look much less significant: 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
2. Remember that your Struggles always lead to strength. Every difficulty in your life, whether big or small, is something God will use to produce more strength, faith, and perseverance in you if you let Him! Pain has a purpose: Romans 8:28
3. Remember that God’s timing is not your timing. God’s plans are almost always different from our plans, but His plans are always perfect! Have the patience to wait on His timing instead of forcing your own: Jeremiah 29:11
4. Remember that God will never leave your side. This struggle is not yours alone, from the moment you ask Jesus to bring you into God’s family, He is by your side to the end: Deuteronomy 31:6

INTRODUCTION:
Remember, Peter and John’s many hopeless situations, when persecution came to them, preaching began to follow right on its heels. The time they were cast into jail, I can see them teaching, upon their release from prison, they went right back to proclaiming the Good News of Jesus. The gospel reaches into areas and the hearts of people who never would have heard it. It is kind of like trying to stamp out a fire, and the harder you jump on it, the more scatter the embers and start fires all over everywhere. So that is what happened, embers spread across the globe.
One hundred years later, Tertullian said, “The blood of the martyrs has become the seed of the church.”
Think back to Acts 1:8, “you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”  This is the outline of chapter eight: the church starts in Jerusalem, and by the end of, Philip is on a ministry mission into the Gentile world.
We see three things that stand out progressively in the expansion of the church: the persecution, which leads to ministry, and the disciples spreading the gospel.
Until this point, we have discussed persecution as an event, what about the people in the persecution? 
The central figure is Holy Spirit (H.S.), and the H.S. explicitly points out the man by the name of Saul in verse 1, “And Saul approved of his execution.” That is a P.S. to chapter 7.  Saul is from the tribe of Benjamin, named for the great King of the Old Testament. We also know he is from Cilicia. Think about this: Is it likely that Saul’s dislike of Stephen started around chapter 6, when Stephen, in verse 9, was preaching from synagogue to synagogue and winning arguments with the highly educated Hellenistic Jews – most likely some of those debates were with this Saul. Was Saul the person who ramrodded the whole trial?  The witnesses and leaders knew him; they laid their garments at the feet of Saul (Acts7:58). I know he was involved from the very beginning.  I can picture the arrogance, “Now, I am once again the greatest debater of scripture…”
Saul was a Pharisee, zealous for Judaism.  He had a brilliant mind, and when he committed himself, it was 100 percent (At least he was determined to something and apathetic). As Saul stood there gloating over what they were doing to Stephen, I don’t think he could have imagined what would happen in a few short months. Saul would go through more trials and persecution; then Stephen ever went through, it might be considered a blessing to die the first time. Because Paul kept being persecuted, time after time, he kept getting it, and getting it, and getting it, and never died until finally, they chopped his head off in Rome.[2]
MAIN POINT:
The death of Stephen set off a blood lust, The blood of one, became a thirst for more, like a school of piranha, a little bit of blood and the righteous mob wants to rip and shred the church.
Back to the verses: “And there arose on that day a great persecution against the church in Jerusalem, and they were all scattered throughout the regions of Judea and Samaria, except the apostles ... But Saul was ravaging the church, and entering house after house, he dragged off men and women and committed them to prison.”
We do not have any of the gory details of what ravaging Saul did; we only have some general terms. Whatever it was, resulted in the people being driven out of the city and scattered all over. Saul drove them out, and I am sure those driven out, were converted Hellenistic Jews and Grecian Jews who did not belong there. Moreover, it may have been in these early times that the whole movement was still associated with Stephen as a Grecian Jew.
It is from this point on in history; we find the Jerusalem church made up mainly of Jerusalem Jews, “except the apostles.” They stayed back to hold on to the fort.
TAKE AWAY:Verse 2 says, “Devout men buried Stephen and made great lamentation over him.” That is a special note of the H.S. for devout men; it is a term for pious Jews. Because of Stephen’s murder and persecution lead to more deaths, some Jews in Jerusalem, who were not Christians, believed the killing of Stephen was wrong. This opens up even more fertile soil for the apostles. See is not this God thing deep…
According to Jewish law, executed criminals must be buried. However, the law also said that they were forbidden to weep or lament over criminals’ death. Here we see a direct protest of devout men, pious people display or show devoutness. They not only bury Stephen, but they also make lamentation over him publicly. This is a reaction by the protest to the murder, and they are flaunting the law in disobedience.
CONCLUSION:
What was the fruit from the martyrdom of Stephen? I think it played on the conscience of Saul. Remember that at Saul’s conversion, he asked, “Who are you, Lord?” The voice answered, “I am Jesus whom you are persecuting” (Acts 9:5)
2 Timothy 3:12 tells us that all who will live godly in Christ will suffer persecution. In one form or another, standing for Christ will raise the ire of our spiritual foe, and he will incite people to oppose us. It will seem unreasonable and unfair. That is because it is. However, when it comes, Jesus said you should count it a great honor. Here are His words in Matthew 5:10-12:
10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 11 “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
That sure is not how the world thinks, but then, most of Jesus’ teaching is different from the way the world thinks. Remember, in Acts 7:52, Stephen said that there was hardly a prophet that their ancestors did not persecute and kill.
Some would say that the Christian life is boring; I suppose they do not know what is to be a Christian.
We certainly do not seek to be martyrs. It is simply an honor to put Him first, even above something so dear as life itself.
We overcome evil and the evil one by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony, the Revelation tells us, for we love not our lives even unto death (Revelation 12:11).
Loving not our lives means dying daily, which should be the “normal” to a Christian life (1 Corinthians 15:31).

• We die to the old nature that we might live unto God (Galatians 5:24-25).
• We die to selfishness that we might show the unconditional love of Christ (Romans 12:1-2).

To people who do not know the Lord, this might seem foolish. To those who know a Savior, this seems costly. But by this, we are set apart, and we are set free.  Is Jesus your Savior or your Lord? If you need help answering this question, I am available after this service to help you understand.
LET’S PRAY:
Father God, we thank you that you want to use us in your marvelous plan of salvation. Help us Lord to die to self-daily, so that you can use us to the fullest. We give our hearts, minds, and souls to you to use as you see fit. In Jesus’ name, we pray, Amen.


[1] Adapted from Dave Willis, 4 things God wants you to remember when life is hard. https://www.patheos.com/blogs/davewillis/author/davewillis/

[2] Finegan, Jack. Handbook of Biblical Chronology. Peabody, Massachusetts: Hendrickson Publishers, 1998.

How we lead our homes will affect generations. Debbie and I were not “helicopter parents,”[1] nor were we totalitarians (the kids might argue differently). We made sure to spend time loving each child and we supported their developmental activities.
Until the age of 16, we knew where our children were every moment of their young lives. What happens when a child turns 16, the driver’s license. Watching them go off on their own life experiences was internal anguish, yet we trusted them (to a point) to do right in the world.

Debbie and I vowed we would not raise our children the same way we were. Corporal punishment is an easy and lazy way to punish bad behavior.[2] As parents, we were determined to reach for their hearts, not their backsides. Because each child is wired differently, there is not one punishment that works for each child; hence this is why I call spanking the lazy way. I can count on one hand the times I used spanking as a punishment for my kids. All were between 3 and 7 years of age. I did not spank them every time something went wrong because it is not always needed; most discipline involved time-outs and restrictions of privileges. Debbie and I never believed in “Go to bed without dinner” punishment. We discovered they hated eating with us while in trouble - silence and lack of attention hurts, too.

As parents, we understood early life experiences shape who they were to become. Every single aspect of human life affects specific neural networks in the brain that change as the results of experiences or does not change due to the lack of experiences. In the book, The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog, Dr. Perry reflects on experiences in his research and his work with children affected by trauma in the early stages of development. Dr. Perry writes, “about 40 of percent of American children will have at least one potentially traumatizing experience by the age of eighteen.”[3] Each year child protection agencies take in millions of reports about children abused or neglected; it is estimated that one-third of these children will have psychological problems because of their abuse.

I read the Introduction and first chapter of The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog when the book became too much, and I had to put it down. A little while later, I purchased the audio-book, downloaded it to my iPad, sat in a quiet part of the house and listened to the tragedies (and treatment successes) for hours on end.

Reading this book got me thinking about the discipline I received as a child. My parents believed in the paddle, and they dared to say, “This hurts me more than it hurts you.” I do not see how; since I was the one feeling it. Looking back at my childhood, I cannot remember all of paddlings or whuppin’s. I usually tell my kids the story of my grandmother making me cut a stick, and heaven forbid if the switch broke. Or my dad taking off his belt, he did not do it very often, but when he did, instant obedience from any child nearby. Then there is a somewhat humorous story that earned me three swings of punishment from the school principal: after football practice, late one afternoon, a couple of friends and I moved a teacher’s classroom (everything) into the boy’s bathroom – I was a junior in High school.

As Debbie and I discussed paddling as a disciplinary issue at the start of our relationship, I discovered we had similar discipline experiences growing up. We agreed that spanking was not removed as a disciplinary tool but would be the option of last resort. Our justification, sometimes it is the only way to get a kid's attention and redirect a bad behavior when logic and reason off the table and all other means of discipline fail. A spank will grab their attention and stopped patterns of misbehavior. I can only remember spanking the youngest daughter twice before the age of 6, once in the middle of a grocery store I picked her up, turned her around and smack. I swore I could hear applause in the next aisle over. Then at five years old, she ran off in a crowd parking lot with cars driving too fast.  Another “big event” happened with our son, he was caught son stealing and lying about it. This warranted more than a spank; then I remembered my thievery incident.

I stole a yo-yo and some hard candy from the Ben Franklin store in Sheridan, Indiana. Providence placed my Grandfather [4] with me for that lesson. He was wise in the ways silence and physical presence.[5] He pulled his truck over to the side of the road after discovering my transgression.  Asking for the toy and gum, he leaned forward a little and said, “Paul, I am disappointed in you, how can I trust a thief?” I was devastated; this man was closer to me than my own father, turning the truck around he drove back to town. After parking in front of the store, he walked around to my door, opened it, grabbed my loot, took my hand, and led me back inside the Five and Dime. At the front counter, my grandfather asked for the manager. The manager arrived he said, “Good afternoon, Mr. Brown.” My grandfather told me to apologize to every person there for stealing, which was followed by a lecture from the manager. And he made me pay for the candy I had to put back. Later, when we returned home, my grandmother lit me up. I was six years old.

The incident at Ben Franklin flashed through my head as I glared at my son. I told him to bring the candy and come with me. We drove back to the convenience store, he apologized, and we went home. When we returned home and as he apologized to his mom, I removed my belt, “Sorry buddy, stealing and lying just don’t belong in this house, let’s go outside.” I sat on the stairs and told him, “I want you to know that I do love you, but what you did was wrong, turn around.” Dang, if I could not do it, as he cried in expectancy. I said, “Austin. Never steal and never lie.” I only had two swats in me and took him back to his mom. Then, I went to a silent place and prayed. He was six years old.

When my kids are ready for children, I am thinking, maybe give them a copy of this book and ask them to read chapter 6. I grieve for even having to punish my kids. I grieve for all the children mentioned in The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog. I pray for all those who have suffered from abusive parents and caretakers.

Works Cited:
Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog. Philadelphia: Basic Books, 2006.
Morse, MaryKate. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2008.
 
[1] What is helicopter parenting? https://www.parents.com/parenting/better-parenting/what-is-helicopter-parenting/

[2]Definition of corporal punishment: punishment that involves hitting someone, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/corporal%20punishment

[3] Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog. Philadelphia: Basic Books, 2006. (2)

[4] We were raised to use all formal relational names and are still used: uncle, aunt, etc…

[5] Morse, MaryKate. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2008

​I always thought Love was a hormonal imbalance or a mental instability until mercy poured down upon me.  Then I sought the meaning of love:

• éros: body love and sexual desire or drive; libido. Primal can burn out quickly. 
• philia: brotherly love of "friendship" or affection. The love of platonic to mean, “without physical attraction.” 
• storgē: natural or instinctual affection. The love of a parent for a child and child to parent.
• agápe: God's unconditional love, and of ours for God; the highest form of all-inclusive love.

• ludus: playful affection between connected people; such as lovers.  This is the hormonal imbalance (fluttering heart, flirting, teasing, and feelings of euphoria) and is commonly how we in the West think of the four-letter word LOVE.
• mania: is an imbalance between éros and ludus, it is an obsessive and possessive love in which a person feels self-value.
• pragma: longstanding or enduring love; fidelity of both in the relationship, it is learned, love.
• philautia: love the self, we cannot share what we do not have; in the extreme, this also refers to self-conceit. 

• xenia: is a "love" word with an association to obligation; this is the respect of host to guests in hospitality, "guest-friendship."

It is true, my brain was "re-wired" when I accepted God's agápe and submitted to a pragma-tic relationship in obedience to His will.

Tonight a gentleman, I met two summers ago during a church conference, will spend the weekend with Debbie and I. He is a retired Marketing Executive that travels the country in his RV working at varies campgrounds, not because he is desolate or homeless, but because he likes to travel and meet new people. Tonight, he is dropping off a trailer downtown and asked if he could visit with Debbie and I. My philia responded and we will show the bounds of xenia to our brother in Christ.
​
Yes, I have thought about this simple word "love" a little bit.  Love is eudemonia and agápe comes from our desire to share the experience of koinōnia.

When I decided to answer the call to ministry, I did not imagine all the tasks that would be required of me each week. Truth be known, living in a culture where busyness and activeness indicates a sign of success is only part of the problem. How a pastor views time and work is another issue. I will carve out time, any time, during the day to help others with their relationship to God by sacrificing time from my spiritual growth. So, at times, my growth suffers…

Returning to my room from an evening of pizza and a movie (we watched Whale Rider) with my cohort (LSF4 @ Portland Seminary), my every intention was to study and rewrite my notes. Instead, I had the rare opportunity of watching TV - my binge fest lasted until 3:30 am.  It was never my intention to skip church services. I woke up late and missed the 9:00 am services at Cannon Beach Community Church.  I vaguely remember turning off my alarm.  An hour later, after realizing how late it was, I thought to myself, “Today would be a great day to sleep in; I never get a chance to rest on or have a Sabbath.” As I lay there in a beautiful, warm, fluffy bed with pillows tucked in all around me, I felt disappointed.
My Rhythm of Life popped into my head. There are three vital behaviors I choose to work on this year, I could visibly see the first in my mind: Start each day praising God: morning devotion and prayer.

How can I start the day praising God when I put myself first?

That got me up. I headed to the desk in my room and grabbed my Journal and started writing.  I believe all days are holy, not just any one day I pick to be holy… 

Now, I have this day (or morning) without any ministry obligations, how could I have forgotten myself so easily? Sitting at my desk, I pondered, “How can I look at the Sabbath or Sundays (on days off) differently?”

I remembered David Robinson writing in Ancient Paths, “Formation is not one single activity but a multifaceted work involving many types of spiritual tools.”[1] Then an article by MaryKate Morris popped into my head.[2] In this article, MaryKate explains how she restores order to her soul with the simple task of tidying.

Spiritual Practice of Sabbath Preparation
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Every person has the potential of creating a spiritual practice through the ordinary tasks of daily life.  Why not use my prep for sabbath as a discipline? Cool!

I laid out my clothes prayed thanksgiving over a suit to wear. Grabbing my shoes, I remembered packing my shoe polish, while polishing, prayed for a safe walk.
 
​Finished dressing and started a prayer walk, passing the beach on the way. What a genuinely pleasant stroll to church.
 
[1] Robinson, David. Ancient Paths: Discover Christian Formation the Benedictine Way. Brewster, MA: Paraclete Press, 2010. (23)
[2] Morse, MaryKate. Missio Alliance. February 27, 2019. https://www.missioalliance.org/a-surprisingly-simple-spiritual-discipline-for-restoring-the-soul/.

Working on update to this, will republish.